It is hard to keep up with this thing. : )

I'm feeling so much better. My clogged duct is now unclogged!! WAHOOO!! I don't want that to happen again!! Seriously don't women go through enough pain!!!

Things are going pretty good. I still need to spend more time with cade and lane during the day. it is just hard. They are doing pretty good. Lane has been doing better on being more independent again. Cade has been fussy lately. night time is not fun. chad will help get them bathed and in pjs but then he leaves to go workout. i'm left with a baby that wants to eat, boys that want to play, read books, eat... last night they were not listening to me so i took away the ninendo for today. i thought they would be better tonight. NOPE!! but it is some of my fault too. tonight i was finishing up a clients pictures that i took almost two weeks ago. i did finish but was stressed out. i was holding a sleeping jude (cause he doesn't sleep during the day unless he is being held and if you lay him down he cries (unless it is his "happy time")). The boys were running around the garage with all my lighting up!! Stressful!! We read books and then they were doing everything they could not to go to bed. i blew up and i think they know i mean business!! they haven't been taking me serious since i had jude. i'm back and i mean business!!! so i need to do better with spending time with them and keep on them until i have my awesome awesome boys back. : ) It has been tough with chad going all the time. every weeknight he leaves to go lift (which is great for him to be able to do that, and i wish i could). It is just hard because supper needs to be fixed before a certain time so he can eat before working out and not get sick. so it is hectic between 4:30-9! my turn will come where i can leave and go workout. i can't wait!! chad is looking really good!! i will have to try and get a picture of him. i'm sure he will let me, he knows what he looks like. :) actually all the guys who are doing it that i have seen are looking really good! i'm proud of them. now i just need to get in shape so chad who looks awesome doesn't have a fat wife. : )

jude...i love him, i love all my boys. he was eating every 3 hours for a few days and now he is back to every other hour. oh well, baby boy needs to eat. this is what i'm willing to do to be able to nurse him. it is all worth it even though it can be frustrating. he is filling out and that makes me proud. : ) it makes misisng out on all the things i would like to do. i have been trying to make my life as normal as possible. Going out and finding a place to feed him. yesterday we went to walmart and i had to feed him before we went in. it was funny because heidi pulled up and looked puzzled. (i was in the back and big boys up front. she came over to see what was going on. LOL! i figured several people prob. thought i just left them in the car. I would never do that!! i can still do the same things i did just need to make sure i can feed him. Now i haven't done girls night out yet or any of my other functions. i'm going to start bunco and sorority back up. which will be good for me. jude has been able to focus so much better, he smiles and still does his grunting. he is getting so big and i can't believe how fast it is going. my sister in law just put in her blog how she couldn't believe how fast it is going with bailey. i haven't gotten all the newborn pics that i wanted. : (

we are planning to go to wichita this weekend but there is suppose to be a stupid snowstorm!! i really want to go and this is the only weekend for awhile that i can go!! it makes me so mad and sad. i want them to see jude before he gets too big!! : (

oh, so i went to my 6 week check up. i had been going over the story over and over in my head on how i was going to tell my doctor. guess what - he wasnt even there!!! i just wanted to laugh!! i saw the nurse practiner - who i had seen for most of my pregnancy. I told her the story. she couldn't believe it. she said to call up to the hospital and do a follow up.

well i can't think of anything else right now. better go get ready for bed!!